What to do... When A Death Occurs

If a death has occurred, we are very sorry for your loss. Rest assured, we will take excellent care of you and your family. 

If a death is imminent, we are here to help you through this difficult time. No matter what time of day or night, someone is always available at A.J. Desmond & Sons to assist you. We are here to serve you whenever you need it. 

If you are gathering information, we encourage you to look throughout this website. For more information, please call, email or visit us and we will help in any way that you need.

A.J. Desmond & Sons is fully committed to serving you with dignity, value and compassion. 

   In the first few hours


1. Call us at 248-362-2500 (Troy) or 248-549-0500 (Royal Oak). If you are out of town, call 800-210-7135 (Troy) or 800-294-5668 (Royal Oak).  If you are not sure about which location, call us and we will help you determine which is best for you.  The funeral home will help coordinate all necessary arrangements. 
2. Begin thinking about what kinds of services and ceremonies you want.  We will assist you in making these arrangements when we meet.  
3. If desired, contact your clergy. Decide on the time and place of the funeral or memorial service. This contact can also be done at the funeral home. 
4. Make a list of immediate family, close friends and business colleagues. Have a close relative or friend notify each by phone. 
5. Collect the information neccessary to complete the State vital statistic requirements:
   • Birth Date
   • Birthplace
   • Father's Name
   • Mother's Maiden Name
   • Social Security Number
   • Veteran's Discharge or Claim Number, if applicable 
   • Education
   • Occupation
   • Marital Status

6. If the deceased is a miltary veteran, review Veterans Info and gather necessary documentation.
7. If desired, decide on an appropriate memorial to which gifts may be made (church, hospice, library, charity or school), if desired.

8. Gather obituary information.  In addition to the above, you may want to include survivors in immediate family, college degrees, memberships held, military service, or outstanding work. Recall an interesting story.  Describe an interest or hobby.  Include time and place of services. If a relative or close firend likes to write, invite him or her to write the obituary.  Otherwise we will put it together for you.  If desired, the funeral home will write an article and submit it to newspapers. The funeral home will also host obituary information on our website.  Select a  photo for the website obituary.     
9. Select clothing for the deceased.  Include a selection of appropriate men's or women's clothing, a full set of undergarments, and any jewelry.  
10. Select a recent photo to assist with the deceased appearance and hair style.   
11. Take some time for yourself.
    

    
    During the next few days
    

    1. If Social Security checks are automatically deposited, notify the bank of the death. 
    2. Coordinate food for the next several days.  Or ask someone to help you.
    3. Consider special needs of the household, such as cleaning or child care, which might be done by friends.
    4. If necessary, arrange hospitality for visiting relatives and friends.  Or ask someone to assist with this. 
    5. Plan the ceremonies.  Meet with clergy to select readings and music. Invite readers and if desired, musicians, to participate in the service. If desired, invite someone to offer a eulogy. Select and notify pallbearers. Collect photos to prepare a Photo Board or Life DVD. Prepare service program. 
    6. Locate the will and notify lawyer and executor.
    7. Check carefully all life and casualty insurance and death benefits, including Social Security, credit union, trade union, fraternal, and military. Check also on income for survivors from these sources. 
    8. Plan for the distribution of flowers after services (family and friends, church, hospital or nursing home).

In the first week

1. Prepare a list of persons to receive acknowledgments of flowers, calls, etc. Send appropriate acknowledgments (can be written note, printed acknowledgments, or some of each). Include "thank you's" to those who have given their time as well.

2. Prepare a list of distant persons to be notified by letter and/or printed notice, and decide which to send to each. 
3. Notify insurance companies.

4. Check promptly on all debts and installment payments, including credit cards. Some may carry insurance clauses that will cancel them. If there is to be a delay in meeting payments, consult with creditors and if needed, ask for more time before the payments are due.

5. If deceased was living alone, notify utilities and landlord and tell post office where to send mail.

6. The funeral director will prepare and submit Social Security Form SSA 721. Check with Social Security to see that number is retired. 
7. Continue to take quiet time for yourself.
8. Please contact us when you have any questions or need assistance.  We are always available for you.